Oh, It's Sunday...Again

Since I was a kid, probably closer to a teenager, I've always had a dislike for Sundays. It was a day when everyone was home and there was always bickering. (my parents were in the middle of a separation/divorce) It seems I have passed on my dislike of Sundays to my children. I learned of this today when my eldest son chimed in with "I hate Sundays"! Truth be told, they usually are stressful because everyone is home and there is always much chaos and bickering. Add the fact that I am exhausted from working the night before, and it truly is a recipe for disaster.

So, today, I have really tried to hold myself together. I even went to church for the first time in (whispering ) months. Afterward, we lugged the kids to Target to look at the fire pits they have on sale. We walked out with a fire pit and 7 chairs to sit around the fire, a bag of marshmallows, and some very excited kids. We spent money we don't have, but I think the memories that will result from our family gathered together around a flickering fire with our roasting sticks and marshmallows, far surpasses that worry.

Here's to making good memories and changing the 'I hate Sundays' for all :)

The Waiting Game

I hate waiting. Did I state that clearly enough? I. hate. it. And when I am waiting on something so nerve-wracking as a job offer for R, it's awful. I am clinging so tightly to my tiny mustard seed of faith that if I hold it any tighter, I may crush it. Or maybe it would start to sprout?


Another interview gone by today. Another shaking of hands across the table. Another, "We'll be in touch". Good Lord, just fill our cup! I keep trying to figure out what the Lord is trying to teach me/us during this constant uphill battle, but it just doesn't come to me. Maybe I'm looking too hard and in all the wrong places.


Believe me I am trying to 'just let go and let God', but I am such an utter control freak that it is almost impossible for me to do that. I just have to come to grips with the fact that I cannot control God's will for our lives and I cannot move the mountains that I have been trying to move!

So, now we wait. And wait some more. I know that eventually we'll know and understand 'the plan'.

It's a HAPPY Meal Kid, Be HAPPY!

Last night I heard those words. They came from me, not surprisingly. There's always a story to go with it...

It all started with E telling one of his brothers to "shut up". I had already told him ninety nine times not to say that again. So, when he said it for the 100th time, I sprung into action. (yes, I know I should have done that after the 2nd time)

I blurted out to him "You're GROUNDED"! From what, I still wasn't sure. I was ready to even ground him from eating. He immediately blasted back with "I am NOT grounded" and then came the throwing around of inanimate objects and total chaos ensued. (as usual) He was so upset and so angry that he refused to get ready to go to his soccer game. He flung his attitude and his cleats all over the place. I flung a shoe at him. ( it was only a baby shoe ) He shot up to his room and started throwing his stuff down the staircase....a book, a clock...you know, stuff. I got a few verbal lashings with " I HATE you Mom" too. In my anger, um, angst, I flew up the stairs, ran over to him to give him a piece of my mind, and was stopped in my tracks. A shelf from the bookcase he was perched atop, fell and landed on the tops of both of my feet. I swear I saw stars... It ended there. I think he was so shocked from what happened, that he feared for his life. I knew that it wasn't his fault the shelf fell on my feet, but he didn't!

Anyhow, after much flailing and wailing, (from the kid) he finally managed to get on his soccer gear to go to his much protested game. We drive all the way across town with a van load of kids and guess what? No game. I had forgotten that this was the week that there was only one game. On Tuesday. We didn't discover this until we trekked all the way down to the far left side of the soccer field because we saw his teams' bright yellow shirts. Turns out the team we headed towards was a team of girls in bright yellow shirts. All in all, the kid got what he wanted...not to play soccer!

By now, there's the question about the Happy Meal comment, I'm sure... I'll try to make it short. We had $20 bucks from an insurance refund, so we decided to take the kids out to eat. They wanted pizza. We headed to a new place called NYPD Pizza... it was a no go. There was only about 12 seats in the whole joint and there were only 4 not already occupied. There are 7 of us...you do the math. We leave, amidst a flurry of protests from our little people. As we are driving I told the kids to decide between a Happy Meal or getting a pizza to take home and eat there. Well, since things are never easy with this crowd, 4 of the kids wanted a Happy Meal and 1 wanted pizza. We ended up going home. With nothing. Both R and I were ready to jump out of the van it was so loud in there. My ears are still ringing. And the kids had Kix cereal for dinner.

You Know It's Going To Be A Bad Day When...

It's already turning out to be one of those days. You know, the kind of day where nothing goes right. It started even before I lugged myself out of bed. I woke up around 3am, 3:35am, 4:15am...you get the picture. I now have an ache in my neck comparable to the time I had spinal meningitis. Thankfully, I don't have the raging fever and stabbing pain in my eyes and head like I had then...so I think the 3 ibuprofen tablets I took should do the trick. Hopefully no need for a spinal tap, (or 4, like I was lucky enough to have) IV antibiotics or narcotic pain killers. (although those might be kind of nice) I'm just chalking it up to a less than stellar night's sleep.

The rest of the morning didn't go very smoothly either. The kids seemed to all wake up in cranky mode. The whining and crying over every little thing certainly didn't help matters here any. And then there's the fact that the dog went missing...

Is it too early for a nice stiff drink?

Thankfully, and I do mean this with all of the love in the world, I only have ONE child at home today. The rest are at the place that I love so very much....school! Maybe I'll take a nap or 2. Or maybe I'll go shopping. Or....nah, I suppose I'll do pretty much what I do everyday. I'll read 'How Does A Dinosaur Say Goodnight?' on the couch with a snugly (albeit demanding) toddler about 25 times, wash dishes, do a few (dozen) loads of laundry, sweep, vacuum, clean pee off of toilet seats ( 4 boys, remember?) and...again, you get the point. I love my life, really I do. I wouldn't change it (other than I would like to have a 'do-over') for the world. I have been truly blessed even though some days it's hard to see through the thick clouds, but I always know there is a silver lining :)


* It's been 10 hours or so since I wrote all of that above...and lo and behold, it was actually a pretty good day! I sat and read the dinosaur book to my little one like I suspected I might, but all in all it was a good day. I made it out to Target, the bank, the carwash. I even survived the ache in my neck. *

Like I said, there's always a silver lining.

You Wanna Be What?

I had a very comical conversation with my eldest son today, only he didn't know it was comical,which made it even more funny! It went like this...

"Hey Mom, there are a few things I want to be when I grow up".
"Oh yeah, what do you want to be"?
"Well, I either want to be a pilot in the Air Force, a police officer or a chef".
(Admittedly, I am very against my sons going into any branch of the military, because I am selfish and I don't want my babies killed in a war) So I replied with this:
"I think you should scratch off being a pilot in the Air Force, you could get hurt and I don't want you to get hurt. Maybe you should be a veterinarian or something like that. You'd be good at that"!
My sons proceeds to look at me like I have 2 heads,and he replies with " You think I'd be good at eating vegetables "?
My snicker turned into some downright belly laughs at this point. He so pointedly asks me what was so funny and why would I think he'd be good at eating vegetables when he hates vegetables,and what kind of job would that be anyway? Can one get paid just for eating vegetables?
So, I had to fill him in on the difference between a veterinarian and a vegetarian. That was fun, and he now thinks he might make a good doctor for animals. He also reminded me how much he likes meat.


Anyhow, today began the first of a couple of visits to the dentist for my now enlightened child. He had to endure having 4 fillings and a tooth extracted, and, he tells me, the 'knock out gas' didn't work. He thought that he would be put to sleep for the procedure and was very dismayed when he found out that would not be the case. At least he was already numbed up and ready when the dentist broke the bad news. I however, had to hear about it in sentences broken up by some very dramatic sobs all the way home. And just think, he gets to do it all again in 2 weeks on the other side of his mouth. I can't wait. (yeah right)

I'd better run. I told the numb-lipped child that I had to wrap him in a towel and sit on him to brush his teeth like I do with his baby brother, as he seems to not want to do such a bang up job of it himself. Oy!

Goofy Girl

Now here's a smile that makes me want to smile back :)

Sometimes it's a lighthearted child that makes me realize that maybe life isn't as bad as I think. My sweet little princess is still smiling like a....well actually, I'm not sure like what, but even when her day was tough because she was fighting a fever, she still found a way to smile. And smile big.

Instead of going into a bunch of mumbo jumbo about how we all need to look for a brigher side, I'm just going to leave it at that.

Her smile says it all...

Blankity, Blank, Blank, Blank

Blank. That's how my heart/mind/body feels today. I don't know exactly where I expend all of my energy, but I am so wiped out. Okay, maybe I do know where I expend my energy. (I'm the mom of 5...6 if you count my husband, and that's enough to bring any woman to her knees) I can't figure out though, why I feel so emotionally, physically and spiritually drained. Shouldn't a good nights sleep take care of that? Nah, I suppose if that were the case, there wouldn't be so many frazzled moms out there, right?



I, however, don't want to BE a frazzled mom. I want to be a calm, cool and collected mom. The mom that everyone wants to be, but isn't. I want to be full of ideas and energy and I want to always have the right answer or solution to every problem that life throws our way. I want to be the cookie baking, bread kneading, book reading, ever patient mom, you know, the mom of every kids' dream? Since I can't ever live up to the picture that I have in my mind's eye about being a mom, I have to resign myself to just do the best that I can with what I've got, and hope that the Lord will cover the rest of the things that I fall so very short of.

I am listening to the lively chatter and some bickering of the kids upstairs...they've just returned home from school with tales to tell, and wow, do they all want to talk at the same time. Each day, on the ride home from school, I get a dizzying account of the adventures and mishaps that were had in their little worlds. They all speak at not only the same time, but at super warp speed as if trying to get in their allotted quota of words for the day. I just try and take it all in without having my head explode with information overload because that would be messy and probably a little bit disturbing too! Sometimes, I just tune it all out, but keep nodding my head to make them think I am still listening.

I'm going to sign off for now, apparently, the kids still have some words to be spoken today...